Jody Wilson-Raybould Caught Bribing Libyan Dictators, Trudeau Promptly Reinstates Her As AG
In an unexpected sequence of events, former Justice Minister and Attorney General, Jody Wilson-Raybould, has been accused of bribing...
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Trudeau Unveils Plan To Send All White Children To "Reconciliation Schools"
OTTAWA — In a fiery speech to the House of Commons, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced that his government will begin a program to...
Breaking: Award-Winning News Company Uncovers Senator Lynn Beyak’s Top Secret Website
In probably one of the most incredible and daring displays of journalism in the modern century, The Feather News has just unearthed...
Aging Cousin Watching In Disbelief As Her Hair Becomes Colonized
Local throat singer Anette Littlefoot expressed disappointment at the first sign of her hair giving up. “First our land, now my hair,”...
In Reconciliation Move, Police Will Do Land Acknowledgement Before Arresting Indigenous People
In a bold reconciliation move, Canada’s police commissioners announced a new initiative designed to mend relations with the country’s...
Is Canada Racist? We Assembled A Panel Of White People To Find Out.
With the rise of hate crimes in other countries and at home, do you think there is a possibility that Canada is racist? “Yes, but…...
Indigenous People Warn Anti-Vax Movement “Do You Want Smallpox? Because That’s How You Get Smallpox
After watching the recent surge in bored parents administering frontier medicine, Indigenous people in Canada expressed disappointment in...
Indigenous Leaders Wish MP Robert Ouellette Would Stop Calling It The “Tipi Of Commons”
Flummoxed at the prospect of admonishing one of their own, Indigenous leader across the country issued a gentle warning to the young...
Liberals Reveal It Was An Elaborate Prank Just To See Conservatives Listen To An Indigenous Woman
Announcing that the recent SNC-Lavelin scandal was just a hoax, Prime Minister Trudeau and his cabinet members began laughing menacingly...
Ghost Of Trudeau Sr. Returns To Console Son: “Thought I Told You To Not Mess With The Indians"
OTTAWA – With a grey fog suddenly appearing in the hallways of 24 Sussex Drive, the haunting ghost of Pierre Trudeau slowly opened the...
Man Who Knows Every Marvel Character Has No Idea What Treaty Number He Lives In
Expressing profound joy over knowing every origin story of his favorite comic book characters, Tanner Flip-Flops stumbled upon the...
Nation Shocked That A Government With A History Of Colonialism Would Do This To An Indigenous Woman
Speaking on the recent developments on the whole SNC-Lavelin affair, local painter Robert Paulsen expressed his grief and despair over...
Uncovered Portrait Of John A. Macdonald Gifted To Indigenous People Evidence Of Very First Dick Pic
VICTORIA – In a stunning discovery, historians at the Royal BC Museum uncovered a 6 x 9 hand-drawn portrait of Sir John A. Macdonald...
Shit Show Proves PM Is Willing To Intervene In Justice For SNC-Lavalin, But Not Justice For Colton
In a move that has literally surprised no one, former Justice Minister and Attorney General, Jody Wilson-Raybould resigned from Trudeau’s...
Trudeau Doubles Down On Reconciliation Efforts By Unveiling His Eagle Feather Tramp Stamp
OTTAWA — Regarding his administration as the architect of modern-day reconciliation, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced he has...
Company’s Only Indigenous Employee Beginning To Think She Is Just There To Pad Diversity Numbers
TORONTO — Realizing that her salary far outweighs the disadvantages of working for a company that doesn’t appreciate her skills and...
Indigenous Voters Just Choosing Whichever Political Party Fucks With The Most Lube At This Point
Expressing a mixture of hope and confusion, Indigenous people in Canada outlined their voting plans for the upcoming 2019 federal...
RCMP Vow To Gain More Views On Their Standoff Videos Than The MAGA Hat Kid
OTTAWA — Marshalling the resources required to create a viral video, RCMP Commissioner Brenda Lucki promised Canadian citizens that their...
White Friend Now An Expert On Race Relations After Watching A Few YouTube Videos
A local friend who works as a sandwich artist had some wise words for an Indigenous college student while both were out enjoying a few...
Website Promises To Help Indigenous Couples Find Out If They're Cousins, Will Be Called Incestry.com
Still reeling from their first date, Misty Littlefoot had an ominous feeling about the man she had just met. “I thought to myself this...
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