Remains Of Burned Down Churches To Be Buried In Unmarked Graves, Forgotten About For A Long Time
The strategy of forgetting about national tragedies by burying it deep beneath Canadian soil has reached towards the recent string of...
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Canada Reflects On The Long Arduous, Difficult, Bloody, Genocidal, WTF, Road That Got Us All Here
As Canadians settle down for a national day of reflection and new found guilt, a few took the time to describe their feelings about the...
Shortage Of Robes For Newly Ordained Priests Forces Catholic Church To Recycle Their Old KKK Hoods
“We figured that they are similar enough in style and intent that we would just reuse the old robes,” said Pope Francis in a new order...
Canadian News Editors Vow To Make Indigenous Journalism More Profitable For Their Businesses
Responding to the lack of Indigenous journalists in the newsroom, Stanley Smith released a bold plan to increase profits by hiring more...
Why It Matters That John A. Macdonald Never Tweeted His Support For Bill C-15
A pack of social justice warriors took to Twitter to express their frustration that the late Prime Minister never signalled his support...
Indigenous People Post Canada On Kijiji In Bid To Buy Country Back
After posting Canada for sale on Kijiji, Indigenous people sat back and waited for all the offers to come piling in. "It's the nuclear...
"All Lives Matter" Yells Man On His Third Marriage
While getting on his soapbox at an All Lives Matter rally, local man Gary Beckert expressed his unshakable belief that everyone should...
Reconciliation In Canada To Be Featured In New “Unsolved Mysteries” Episode
After mysteriously leaving the hearts and minds of Canadians just as easily as it entered, reconciliation with Indigenous people will be...
RCMP Commissioner Vows To Complete Their Mission Of Fully Displacing Indigenous People
Responding to criticisms that the RCMP is not doing enough to stop the ongoing violence against Mi'qmaq fisheries in Nova Scotia, RCMP...
Attack On Mi'kmaq Fishery Sparks National Debate On Whether Lobsters Scream Before Being Boiled
Watching in wonder at the fiery scene unfolding before them, citizens across the nation pondered if those lobsters screamed before they...
This Asshole Built A Railroad, Now We All Have To Work A 9 to 5
Expressing incredible grief and frustration at the thought of spending the best years of his life taking orders from overly-happy...
RCMP Relieved The Racism Spotlight Is Taken Off Them For Once
Breathing a deep sigh of relief as her flock of constables did the same, RCMP Commissioner Brenda Lucki considered herself blesse that...