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Why It Matters That John A. Macdonald Never Tweeted His Support For Bill C-15

A pack of social justice warriors took to Twitter to express their frustration that the late Prime Minister never signalled his support...

Indigenous People Post Canada On Kijiji In Bid To Buy Country Back

After posting Canada for sale on Kijiji, Indigenous people sat back and waited for all the offers to come piling in. "It's the nuclear...

"All Lives Matter" Yells Man On His Third Marriage

While getting on his soapbox at an All Lives Matter rally, local man Gary Beckert expressed his unshakable belief that everyone should...

Reconciliation In Canada To Be Featured In New “Unsolved Mysteries” Episode

After mysteriously leaving the hearts and minds of Canadians just as easily as it entered, reconciliation with Indigenous people will be...

RCMP Commissioner Vows To Complete Their Mission Of Fully Displacing Indigenous People

Responding to criticisms that the RCMP is not doing enough to stop the ongoing violence against Mi'qmaq fisheries in Nova Scotia, RCMP...

Attack On Mi'kmaq Fishery Sparks National Debate On Whether Lobsters Scream Before Being Boiled

Watching in wonder at the fiery scene unfolding before them, citizens across the nation pondered if those lobsters screamed before they...

This Asshole Built A Railroad, Now We All Have To Work A 9 to 5

Expressing incredible grief and frustration at the thought of spending the best years of his life taking orders from overly-happy...

RCMP Relieved The Racism Spotlight Is Taken Off Them For Once

Breathing a deep sigh of relief as her flock of constables did the same, RCMP Commissioner Brenda Lucki considered herself blesse that...

Sask. School Forced To Shut Down After Reconciliation Outbreak

Saskatoon - Attempting to mitigate the damage done by a few rogue students bent on giving their land back to Indigenous people, Principal...

Desperate To Oppress Covid-19 With Government Resources, Canada Offers To Sign A Treaty With It

Rejoicing at the idea of bringing back the oldest Canadian trick in the book, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced a new plan of...

RCMP Announce Shooter's True Motives Will Be Revealed During His Inevitable Special On Netflix

After hearing news about the mass shooting that took place in Nova Scotia, RCMP Commissioner Brenda Lucki and Netflix Chief Content...

Canada's Grandma Assures Public She Is Still Absolutely Useless In Times Like These

After addressing the entire world in a heartfelt and warming message of hope, Queen Elizabeth II assured everyone that the Royal Family...

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