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China Admits It's All An Elaborate Ploy To Give Indigenous People Their Land Back

After finally tapering off the deadly Covid-19 virus in their country, China's government announced their true intentions behind unleashing the dangerous plague to the Western nations.

"We fully admit that a virus destined to bring western nations to its knees, crash the economy while foreclosing mortgages and bankrupting land owners would bring equilibrium back to Indigenous communities," said a defiant President Xi. "As the original people and distant cousin to us *wink* they should have their sovereign dreams realized as Indigenous people. If this could give them back their land, then we would do it again, and again..."

After confirming the world's worst fears that this was a form of biological warfare President Xi returned back to imprisoning civilians, torturing Muslims in modern day concentration camps, ensuring iPad factories are fully staffed with children who will most likely attempt to jump from rooftops, and ushering in a new age of government surveillance and control.


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